The Flounder Labeled "Fake News Media" by the Lyon, Hallway Brawl Ensues

By: Fey Knoos

Toronto, ON – The Flounder has been a polarizing force in Mackenzie’s school culture for years. Some love it; others hate it. Some think it is the most non-biased and factually correct news outlet around; while others think it is so fake that it must be satirical. However, fear of media polarization at William Lyon Mackenzie has escalated dramatically in recent days.

On Tuesday, the Lyon, one of Mackenzie’s most widely read news outlets, denounced its arch rival, the Flounder. In a scathing article, the Lyon called the Flounder “fake news media” and claimed it had “low ratings.”

As if this was not enough to widen the rift between the two factions, Flounder editor Gowan O’Duffy confronted Lyon writer Jimmy Minh in the Computer Science hallway, setting off a massive brawl in which social distancing was not maintained.

“This kind of division in the Mackenzie community is not appropriate,” pleaded the head of the William Lyon Mackenzie’s Department Of News, Robbie Li. “That is why we will be taking emergency action. From now on, all news will be censored, and any articles we deem as potentially disruptive to the school environment will be banned in a New York minute.”

The chief editor of the Lyon, Simon Gate, was available for comment. However, before the interview could commence, he said “that’s a very nasty question” and walked away.